positHIVely in Love

from Letters to Theo, my special someone

Honestly, I don’t know know what to think about you did to me that night.

Everything was so fun. I did not expect how handsome you are when I first laid eyes on you. I always just hear you on the phone and now, you were actually with me. 

I love the way you smile. I love the way you speak. I love the way you look at me.

I could not look straight into your eyes. I was embarassed. I was feeling ugly. But you seemed to not mind. You seemed to be enjoying yourself. I hope so. I wanted you to enjoy being with me.

I loved the way you told me a lot of things about you. I loved your energy, your vigor, your passion. And we did not even fuck that time. Truly, I enjoyed your company and last night, I did not want it to end. I wanted you to be just there until the wee hours of the morning. I could have spend the whole night with you. I could have slept with you - literally and figuratively.

I want you. I desire you. It burns deep inside me. 

When the time came that you should go, I walked with you to the tricycle terminal. It was already dark and there is only a faint light coming from a lamp post. Everything else is in shadows. You surprised me by holding my hand. I was so shocked. But I was much more shocked when you faced me and kissed me on my lips. It was a soft and gentle kiss, but it did send a lot of electricity throughout my bloodstream. I went hard. I kissed you back. I felt like a virgin again. You embraced me and I held you close to me. 

I touched your cock. You felt my erection against you. You were asking me why I was hard. You knew the answer. I know you do. I did not want to let go. I just wanted you to take me then and there. I would have made love to you if I were just braver. I can stay with you like this… 

Forever?

Everything was so perfect. The darkness hid us from view but even so, we knew we liked what we did. I asked you to come visit me again and you said you would. I went home with legs wobbling. 

I am stunned. You were like a bee who stung me with your sweet honey and venom.

Now, I am scared. I do not know what to do… 

You gave me a dilemma that kept me awake all night.

What is it that you did to me?

Why did you do what you have done?

Why?

Oh whatever… I loved it all of it…

And shit, I think I might be falling in love with you.